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Lame Duck Obama Actually Grows Hitler Mustache to Fuck with Tea Party

WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Obama announced today that, since the midterm elections are over, he has grown a Hitler mustache just to fuck with the Tea Party. 

“How do you like me now, Ted Cruz? Ooooo I’m scaaaary aren’t I?” asked President Obama in front of a crowd of reporters in the White House Briefing Room. “I just don’t give a fuck anymore about this bipartisan bullshit,” he added.