SatireV

Breaking

and entering

BeatYale

Yale Football Team Watches The Sound of Music to Get Pumped for The Game

NEW HAVEN, CT--Ahead of the much-anticipated annual match-up between the Harvard and Yale football teams, scouting reports indicate the Yale  Football team is watching The Sound of Music as a morale-building exercise.

Selling HY ticket... please email me... please :(

Hi There!

Just another Quincy Penguin selling his Harvard-Yale ticket. I am totally selling it for normal reasons like everyone else, and I am definitely not selling it just because I haven’t seen a fellow human being in 3 days and this is the perfect excuse to exchange awkward smiles.

$70 OBO.... message me if interested. Please. I'll give the money to charity or whatever; I just really need human contact right now. It’s not my fault all my classes are videotaped and I have fused into my dorm-room chair like the crew of The Flying Dutchman.