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Quiz

QUIZ: Is This a Line from One of This Semester’s UC Emails or a Quote from Star Wars’ Chancellor Palpatine?

Chancellor Palpatine wearing a UC pin

1. “You deserve a refund. Student organizations deserve increased, timely funding. We all deserve a new, effective student association that works for us.”

A) UC Email

B) Chancellor Palpatine

 

Answer: The entitled repetition of “deserve” should be a dead giveaway that this was written by a Harvard student!

 

 

2. “In order to ensure our security and continuing stability, the Republic will be reorganized into the first Galactic Empire for a safe and secure society.”

A) UC Email

QUIZ: Is He Ghosting You, or Is He Just A Literal Undead Spirit?

ghost man
Guys can be so difficult to figure out sometimes.  I mean, really, do you want to go on another date or do you want to suck out my life force? Will you be my beau, or are you just going to keep shouting “boooo?” Luckily, this quiz is here to help you figure out if that guy you’ve been seeing is ghosting you or if he’s just… an actual ghost.
 
When’s the last time you saw him?
A) Yesterday in the dining hall, and he avoided my eye contact…

Pick A Fabulous Fall Drink And We'll Tell You Your Deepest Darkest Fear!

fall drinks

Are you more of an espresso fellow or a vanilla chai guy? Choose one of these fun, festive fall drinks and we’ll tell you what that says about your innermost insecurities, you vulnerable little coward!

  1. Vanilla Chai Latte

QUIZ: Is Your Prefrosh Cooler Than You?

guy
It's that time of year again: You're hosting a prefrosh for Visitas, and you're not sure if the thing that they are referencing is a new AP exam or a drug you've never tried. Is your prefrosh cooler than you are? Take this handy quiz to find out!
 
You stalk them beforehand. Their Facebook profile picture...
a) is a blurry picture of a meme and/or car.
c) is a senior yearbook photo.
d) has more likes than yours, loser.
 
When they arrive, they bring:

Alright, Nerds: Take This Harry Potter Quiz Full of Nonsense Fairy Words and Shut Up

The Hogwarts Coat of Arms
Listen up, geeks. We know you grown-ass doofuses love Harry Potter, so we threw together this personality quiz full of gibberish. Take it and shut up.
 
1) What's your favorite Hogwarts house? (People really have favorites, don't they?)
 
A) Babadook
B) Gobbledegook
C) Snufflestuff
D) Who gives a shit?
 

Quiz: Are These From The Mission of Harvard College or Bodak Yellow by Cardi B?

1. The mission of Harvard College is to educate the citizens and citizen-leaders for our society.

2. Said, "Lil bitch, you can't fuck with me if you wanted to"

3. We do this through our commitment to the transformative power of a liberal arts and sciences education.

4. I don't dance now, I make money moves

5. I'm a boss, you a worker, bitch, I make bloody moves

6. We hope that students will begin to fashion their lives by gaining a sense of what they want to do with their gifts and talents... 

5 Literally IMPOSSIBLE “Would You Rathers” for People with Fears of Commitment

A woman thinking

These "would you rather" questions are darn near impossible, especially if you have a paralyzing fear of commitment. Would you rather...

1. Flunk out of college OR not be allowed to respond “maybe” to your friend’s party on Facebook?

Oh boy is this one difficult. You could choose to be an incredible disappointment to your family and jeopardize your future job prospects. But then again how can you be certain that you won’t be invited to an even better party at the same time?

 

Who Said It: Dean Khurana or Mulan?

1. “Why is my reflection someone I don’t know?”

2. “The mask of perfection wears us down.”

3. “Who am I?”

4. “No-one knows who I am.”

5. “If I were truly to be myself, I would break my family’s heart.”

6. “You’ll die for honor.”

7. “We share the belief that we are here to do something together that none of us could do alone.”