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Netflix Announces Revival of Series It Has Yet to Release

Streaming giant Netflix announces plans to be nostalgic for you.

LOS ANGELES, CA -– Ten minutes ago, Netflix released a statement saying that it plans to create a new series called School, which will follow the lives of five socially awkward teenagers played by full-grown adults as they navigate topical social issues in a progressive yet relatable manner. Five minutes later, Netflix announced that cast members of School who have not successfully transitioned from TV to film will return for a highly-anticipated revival series – More School – set to air after a post-finale mourning period of an appropriate length.

“We can already sense that viewers are going to feel extremely nostalgic about School after the show ends,” said Netflix CEO Reed Hastings. School’s revival is in the company of recent reboots of shows like Full House, Wet Hot American Summer, Gilmore Girls, and any other series with semi-famous cast members currently chasing their youth and looking for work. 

School is going to have a cult following, and then once we start to air More School a few years later, thousands of people will claim they watched the original before it was cool,” explained Netflix’s chief marketing executive, Buff R. Ing. 

Ing added that “School will end with a lot of questions left unanswered,” and that “people will be so attached to these improbably attractive yet likeable misfits that they will want to know what happened to their characters.” Netflix has already agreed to a deal with Urban Outfitters to create a first line of trendy School posters for the release, and a second line of sentimental graphic tees for the revival.

The Board of International Netflix General Entertainment (B.I.N.G.E.) rejected claims that they are “jumping the gun.” Self-proclaimed Netflix aficionado Catherine O’Riley, whose Twitter bio declares that she watched all 84 hours of Friends in only 3 days, fully supports the board’s confidence, as the wait for the School reboot is “already killing her.”

© 2015