By Your Insecurities

Wow! You made out with a girl tonight! You’re probably feelin’ like quite the hot shot. A girl put her mouth on your mouth for an extended period of time! She was even pretty cute.

Too cute…

Definitely too cute to have made out with you voluntarily…

Why did she do that? She’s definitely out of your league and she didn’t seem under the influence of anything. Was it a dare? It must’ve been a dare. Her friends probably told her they’d pay her $100 to make out with the weirdest looking person at the party. No, $100 isn’t enough. $200? Realistically though, what could anyone pay a girl like her to engage in any kind of physical contact with the likes of you?

She probably tripped and fell on your mouth. Yes, that’s it. She tripped mouth first and tried to use her tongue to catch herself. That makes a lot more sense than a girl like her – or any girl, really – intentionally kissing you.

And even if she had kissed you on purpose, she’s just one girl. She doesn’t speak for the entire female population. Maybe she has a weird fetish for people who are disgusting and she’s the only one of her kind. There were others once, but they’ve died out, and she’s the last one left. Fetish or not, even she’s probably deeply ashamed of what happened.

Wow. Did you actually think for a second that you weren't completely hideous? That's just sad. Really pathetic, even for you.

Yup, safe to say you’re still totally repulsive. Who knows if anyone will ever touch you again!