By Elaine (aka @shegotmorevotes270)

You may have posted your Valencia filtered “I voted” sticker pic on Instagram, but I posted a picture of my “I voted” face tattoo because I’m a better social media activist than you are!

Uh huh, you think you’re special? You think you care about American social media activism because you took a picture of a sticker and VSCO’d it? Heh. Cute.

Every Super Tuesday, I get an “I Voted” face tattoo. Right on my forehead! And every election year, two weeks after that first Tuesday after the first Monday in November when I cast my ballot in the general election, I begin a twenty three-week process to get that tattoo painfully removed because frankly, I love Democracy and my followers more than you do.

What do you do for the Insta? What do you sacrifice for this country? My skin is being zapped off layer by layer with each election year!

You think that selfie you posted of you with your midterm election ballot is original? I snuck into someone else’s voting booth, posted a selfie with them and their ballot, and spent the night in jail for committing a felony. So, who’s more dedicated to normalizing voting through social media? You tell me.

I made my pic from me watching the Democratic Debate last week my Facebook profile picture with the hashtags #getouttothepolls #petecuteigieg. It got thirty-seven comments. Thirty-seven! How many did yours get? Oh right. You didn’t post anything from the debate, did you?

Did you even watch? Do you even care about the environment, or animal rights, or whatever the fuck that debate was about? Do you even know who you’re voting for? I had my followers do a poll, so I could decide.

Oh, I also saw that you Snap-storied a video from the Women’s March in January. Well, I time traveled back to 1963, invented Snapchat, and Snap-storied a video from the March on Washington. So nice try.