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Satire V's Oscar Predictions

Each year the Oscars happen, and this year Satire V has made some predictions that are sure to upset conventional wisdom.
Ahead of the 89th Academy Awards, Satire V has made some predictions about this evening's big event:
Instead of presenting its annual awards, the Academy will unveil the curtain to reveal 30 people named Oscar in the Los Angeles area.
President Trump will resign in the middle of Jimmy Kimmel's biting monologue about him.
Natalie Portman will give birth onstage in a once-in-a-lifetime performance art piece.
D.W. Griffith's Birth of a Nation will receive a special "Worst Picture Ever, Bar None, Please Stop Calling Us Racist" award from the Academy.
Meryl Streep will strip off her mortal skin and ascend to the heavens right in front of the audience.
In a daring political statement, a homeless man will lick all of the Oscars before they are awarded.
Beloved British actor Michael Cain will have a heart attack and die during the In Memoriam segment, causing producers to pause until they can find a tasteful photo of Cain to add to the montage.
Lin-Manuel Miranda will claim to be “humbled," but will secretly not be humbled.
Ray Liotta will storm the stage during the Best Actor award and demand a belated nomination for his starring role in Goodfellas.
© 2017