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Race-Blind America Keeps Walking Into Racial Walls, Falling Over Racial Objects

Oh Magoo, you've done it again.

America, which has recently become “race-blind”, has been increasingly struggling to live a sighted life in a world that still seems pervaded by race. 

According to multiple sources, this past week has been particularly rough for race-blind America.

“I really busted up my hip last Thursday when I tripped on that Cherokee headdress,” said America, lying on its side and icing its hip.  “I didn’t see it at all.  My friends are like: ‘Maybe you should get a racially-aware guide dog,’ but I don’t think I need to go through all that hassle.  I can still see racial things fine.”
America’s friends became increasingly worried, however, as it became obvious that America really wasn’t able to see race in any capacity.
“Frankly, I’ve been worried ever since the US Supreme Court struck down the Voting Rights Act,” said Belgium.  “America kept claiming it wasn’t race blind, but not twenty minutes later it walked straight into a Cambodian restaurant’s window.  Had to pay for the damage and everything – it was pretty embarrassing.”

America’s race-blindness also led to the country getting its driver’s license revoked after crashing into 2 different Japanese-made cars within 3 days. 

Despite bumping into several Middle Eastern men while walking down the street and stubbing its toe on a pile of Al Sharpton books, America remains fiercely independent.

As of press time, America had fallen down the stairs of a local taqueria, and was requesting the help of a doctor of any ethnicity. 


© 2013