and entering

Facebook Complains that New Users Suck

Zucks released his statement today.

PALO ALTO, CA - In a written statement released today, Facebook called the new users that joined the social networking site this past month "confusing" and "hard to get used to," expressing a desire to restore Facebook to its prior state.

"I don't understand why we need these people," Facebook CEO and founder Mark Zuckerberg said. "We had a really good thing going with our old users, and these new people just don't make any sense." 

Facebook also complained that the new users are trying too hard to be like the users of Twitter and Google+.  It is starting a campaign to get people to unfriend all users who have joined in the past three weeks.  The goal is to "Bring Back the Old Facebook."

Facebook veterans are opposing the new campaign, saying that the new users enhance their Facebook experience.  Said one long-time user, "This shit happens every year or two.  Remember when a whole bunch of 'creepy' people joined and wanted to see their friends' updates all in one area called the 'news feed'?  We got used to those new people after a while.  Creepy becomes the new normal eventually."

© 2011