BREAKFAST BLEND, MA - A local coffee bean has been having some second thoughts about whether it really wants to try the grinder. But after weeks of no action, this bean thinks it may be time to use the appliance soon, even if it does have some reservations.

The bean, purchased 20 days ago, has always been forward-thinking and accepting of its own desires. “It’s not that I have anything against beans who’ve already tried the grinder. In fact, I completely respect their choice to do that. I’m just worried about putting myself out there like that.”

“Really, I just want to make sure that my first experience with the grinder is really my decision,” the bean clarified. “I don’t want to be pressed into it.”

Most beans who try the grinder reportedly enjoy it. Among beans polled this morning, 95% of them felt awakened by the grinder. The other 5% were stuck in the filter.