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Instructor-Student Sex Ban "Obviously" Doesn't Apply to Tenured Professors

According to the new rules, students in seminar courses must raise their hands before having sex with their professor.

Cambridge, MA—Following two weeks of numerous frantic calls and e-mails from professors, teaching fellows, and weirdly enthusiastic undergraduates, the Faculty of Arts and Sciences’ Committee on Sexual Misconduct Policies made a statement today that the ban on student-faculty sexual relationships announced this month “obviously” didn’t apply to professors with tenure. In the joint statement, the members of the committee apologized for any consternation the announcement may have caused, and reassured tenured faculty members that sexual intercourse with their undergraduate and graduate students could continue “as usual”.

“Thank God,” said one Folklore and Mythology professor, who asked to remain anonymous. “I was worried I was going to have to remove the hands-on modules from Folk and Myth 114, ‘The Expressive Body’. The textbook just doesn’t do it justice.”

Though some student groups have criticized the carve-out for senior instructors, the reaction from undergraduates has been largely positive. Cynthia Yang, Currier ’16, noted that courses like Ec 10 have “always been about the sex,” and that future generations of Harvard students would be missing out if certain activities were prohibited.

When asked for comment, FAS officials merely expressed surprise that tenured professors ever thought this might apply to them in the first place.


Image credit: Wikimedia

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