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5 Mind-Blowing Facts About Graduation and, More Importantly, The Apocalypse

I hope you reserved enough commencement tickets for the Four Horsemen!

Hey seniors (and mortals)! Check out these totally mind-blowing facts about graduation and, more importantly, the Apocalypse:


1) You are leaving behind your old life.

This is a major milestone in your life, but it can be rather bittersweet. You’ll never have another experience like college, so leaving behind everything that you once knew can be scary. Especially when you are leaving it behind as your soul is lifted from your earthly body and you transcend into the sweet bliss of eternity.

2) You’ll reflect on all of the great memories you had.

It’s crazy to think about how quickly time has gone by. It feels like just yesterday that you stepped onto campus for the first time. Looking back at old photos, you’ll realize just how much you have grown as a person. These memories will be particularly important to guide you through the seven year period of unimaginable suffering, known as the Great Tribulation (Daniel 7:25)

3) You’ll miss your friends.

If you’re an underclassman, that means all of your senior friends are about to leave campus. You know who else will be gone? All of the faithful, who will join the LORD in the Kingdom of Heaven as the sinners are condemned to remain on Earth and suffer for the next millennia.

4) Everyone is preparing for the next stage of their life.

As a graduating senior, a lot of people will be asking you what you plan on doing next. In particular, they will be asking whether you have stockpiled enough food and water to last through the torment of the Whore of Babylon as she yields up her abominations onto Earth.

5) The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse will plague the sinners with war, disease, famine and death.

I looked, and behold, an ashen horse; and he who sat on it had the name Death; and Hades was following with him Authority was given to them over a fourth of the earth, to kill with sword and with famine and with pestilence and by the wild beasts of the earth. Also, “Fair Harvard” will be playing in the background.


© 2017