SatireV

Breaking

and entering

What’s the Point of Having a Sun If It’s Just Gonna Fucking Set at 4pm?

I tried to take a photo of the sun, but it had already fucking set. So, here's a streetlight instead.

Let me paint you a picture. I’m going for my bi-monthly afternoon jog when suddenly, it’s pitch black. I’m disoriented, and I accidentally run off the road into a rose bush. I’m stuck there for three hours. All because the sun decided it was "cool" to set before dinnertime. Why the fuck do we even have a sun if it’s just gonna drop like a sack of potatoes at 4pm?

Good thing I just rebuilt my entire house to be powered by solar energy. Yesterday, I was in the shower, and the water turned into an ice bath at 4:30pm. I was so startled that I smacked my head against the shower head and got a black eye. Do you know how embarrassing that is to explain to my coworkers?

Speaking of work, I should mention my adventure today. At around 3:30, I decided to take a little nap. When I woke up at 5:30 and saw that it was pitch black, I assumed I had slept clear through to the next morning. I put on my suit and commuted an hour to work only to find that the office was locked, and my car was now out of gas. All because the piece of shit sun is too lazy to stay up there for a couple more hours.

Seriously, this ball of flame literally has one job. I mean, Jesus Christ, the poor plants are out here working their asses off trying to do a little photosynthesis. How is that fair?

I’m no scientist, but I feel like we’re really overdue for some kind of supernova at this point. 

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