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Pop Music Is Unoriginal and Uninspired, Which Is Why I Listen Exclusively to 12th-14th Century Gregorian Chant

A Gregorian chant
By Arnoldius B. Pretentium '19
 
Last year at a party, my friend and I undertook a daring endeavor. We pushed our way through the throng of sweaty college students to find the DJ. We were going to request a song.
 
“Do you know ‘Invitatorium: Deum Verum’?” I said to the DJ.
 
“Yeah?”
 
“Can you play it next?”
 

Woman Listening to Dua Lipa About to Fuck Shit Up

British pop singer dua lipa

CAMBRIDGE, MA--After three minutes and 32 seconds of listening to music from English pop singer Dua Lipa, area woman Julia Bradley is about to fuck shit up.