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Area Mom Wondering If It’s Been Long Enough To Buy Tiki Torches Again

CANTON, OH - Sources say that area mom Linda S. Givings has been contemplating purchasing a Tiki brand torch for her backyard, but is worried that their recent use as a neo-nazi symbol may still prevent her from doing so. While the torches are exactly the kind of look she’s going for, they also possibly continue to serve as an unsettling reminder of just how racist the underbelly of America can be.
 

Area Mom Excited to Reclaim Facebook Newsfeed Dominance Since Election End

WESTON, MA — After learning the election news cycle has finally died down, local mother Carol Danforth was reported to be eagerly anticipating the opportunity to flood her family and friends' news feeds with life updates and Despicable Me minion quote images.

“It’s been pretty difficult these past few months. Because of all the shared election content over social media, the average likes on my food blog posts and anti-vaccine infographics has gone down from 5 to 3,” said Danforth.