WINTHROP HOUSE--Area mouse and Winthrop House resident Cheesers McLongtail was spotted sitting alone in the Winthrop dining hall and browsing Facebook on his computer. However, when approached by his friend Gabrielle Young '17, McLongtail claimed he was "just getting some work done before the weekend."

McLongtail, who lives in Winthrop's A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, and K entryways, claims he prefers the level of anonymity that the dining hall offers. "When I'm in here, nobody bothers me," said McLongtail, quickly opening Gmail in a new tab. "Turns out nobody wants to sit with a stranger! Ha ha."

Some of Winthrop's other residents have seen McLongtail in the dining hall, but have never seen him doing work. "Usually he's clicking through his ex's profile pictures," said cockroach Holyshit Itcanfly, resident of C entryway and the dining hall. "I'm in here all the time and I've never seen him so much as open a Google doc."

But if McLongtail is pretending to work while masking his sad lack of friends, you would be hard pressed to convince him of it. "What? No way," said McLongtail in response to the accusation. "I have plenty of friends. People leave food out on the floor for me all the time!"